SIQI
020292
<33MAYDAY
TP AMS Y2

wondering around the clouds and find your way into my mind through the words. there you are. life's good :)

7:47 AM i think i should blog about this okay.

my ah po has been crying at night recently.and nobody seems to care.her age is 90+ and do you think crying every night over sad things is good for her health?she kept saying that her life is miserable and is always worried about my gonggong(grandfather) who is already dead when im not even born yet.my family will just say let her cry and she'll sleep when she's tired.you cant imagine how its like to see an elderly crying so sadly and keeps saying how tough life has been.sometimes i wish to reply her but she speaks hainanese,i dont.i only understand what she speaks.her life is tough she said,true enough;losing her life companion.yes,she may be very annoying when she keeps talking non stop.all of us staying with her sometimes could not tolerate anymore,and we'll blow up.my aunt,dad would raise their voice,and i just understood that it was necessary.you just could not imagine it,so save your comment.she could just walk to the bathroom,get ready to bathe when she already bathed several times.its just that she had forgotten despite numerous reminders are given to her by us.she could change several set of clothes too,insisting that she had not done so yet.she needs attention,she needs care but we all are just too busy to even care for ourselves,not mentioning giving her her basic wants,which is lending her a listening ears.my aunty and uncle would sometime visit ah po,but its just because of the mahjong session that make them come 'all' the way from bishan st 13 to st 12 my house.how great.the main motive/purpose is not even visit ah po.and i still deeply remember that my aunty raised her voice at my ahpo just after several minutes of nagging.lets now think of my aunts,dad,maid who take care of ahpo the whole year 24 hours everyday?should they(aunty) even raise their voice?even if this is so,my ah po still think that they can better take care of her rather than my family.ah po think greatly of them and wish to stay at my aunty house.when she's crying just now,i tried to console her but to no avail.she kept repeating that im still young,i know nothing.yeah,compared to the adults who have years of life experience,i know nothing.the only thing i know is to just sit in front of her,trying to listen to what she wants to speak.its just too bad i cant speak hainanese.the people she wish to see or talk to is not my family but is my aunty's.i bet they(aunty) know.but i hope they know.i know they(aunty) have to work,and may not have time to visit her but my family also have our things to do right?and 'dont have time' cant just be the reason for not visiting ah po except on mahjong days.because we all are one family.ah po is my father's mother.my ah po.you all's mother. i hope relatives of mine who happen to see this post would spend more time to visit ah po.everything typed above is just my point of view and i may not know or understand any reasons behind their 'unconcerning act' because no one tell me.maybe i'll realise the others point of view some other time,then i'll not be so one sided heh.i understand.i dont understand.